Big Wheels

If you’re an obsessed liberal like me, you’re already up on the BIG news within the lefty-blogosphere, but for the rest, I have a couple of predictions to make:

• Cheney is off the Bush ticket in 04, citing health concerns, of course.
• Condi Rice is out, um, let’s say by next January. This will be a “need rest and relaxation” resignation, but we’ll know that’s not true.
• Karl Rove is brought before Congress, possibly brought up on charges, but definitely cannot help the reelection campaign for Georgie-boy next year.

And here is why: There is a story that you probably haven’t heard much about yet, unless you read the Washington Post (requires a simple, one-time registration). The long and short of it is two people in the White House exposed the wife of former ambassador Joseph Wilson as an undercover operative for the CIA. Last July, these two shopped around a story about Wilson’s wife to at least six reporters before they got Robert Novak to break the story.

Joseph Wilson, for those who may not recognize the name, went to Niger last year to find out information on the supposed sale of Yellowcake Uranium from Niger to Iraq. The documents Wilson was given were poor forgeries and fakes; there was no sale. Wilson let the Administration back in Washington know this, but the Bushies still felt it would sound good in the State of the Union Address, last January. These are the infamous “sixteen words.” Wilson, sick of hearing the faked documents used as proof of Saddam’s WMD program, told the press in July his findings.

A week later, Novak runs with the story about Wilson’s wife. It was pure revenge from the White House, trying to send a chilling-effect to anyone else who may have the bright idea of exposing the Adminstration’s lies. And it was also highly illegal, a felony that can cost $50,000 in fines and 10 years in prison.

Boys and girls, this is it. This is the big one. This is going to shake up the Bush White House like only one other event in recent history. I’ll leave it up to you to guess which Nixon scandal I am comparing this to.

For MUCH MUCH more coverage of this, read the above linked article in the Washington Post, this article from the Nation (from July when the story was new), and check out ongoing blog coverage from Josh Marshall’s Talking Points Memo, including an interview with Wilson, and Atrios.

There have been a thousand cuts that should have had this Administration bleeding to death and on life-support, but this one has the CIA looking for an arrest from the Justice Department. This cut may have hit an artery.

Edited: Wilson went to Niger not Iraq... duh.

Posted by Jonathan at 04:00 AM, 29 September 2003 | Comments (2)

Twenty Seconds

Katherine, Chris, and I went into the City on Sunday morning to see Neil Gaiman. Every year there is a big baker’s-dozen-blocks-down-5th-Avenue event called New York Is Book Country. Neil was signing books for an hour, from 11:30 am to 12:30 pm. Those of you who know me personally would be proud to know I woke up in time to make an 8:40 train into the City, with tremendous help from Katherine.

Once we were in the City, we walked about twenty blocks uptown. The weather was beautiful, and being Sunday, there was very little traffic, pedestrian or otherwise. If I wasn’t so grumpy from waking up early and having no sugar or caffeine, I really would have been enjoying myself. As it was, I was begrudgingly grateful that nothing had gone wrong. It was quite a treat to see 5th Avenue closed off from 42st (where the New York Public Library building sits, clever, no?) all the way up to 55th Street. Neil was going to be signing at 49th, where DC Comics had set up a booth in the Graphic Novel section of the fair. We got there by 10:30, and found just a few people ahead of us, milling about by the platform where Neil would sign.

Now I had to get a book.

Or, in other words, I’m an ass. I’ve been a semi-rabid Gaiman fan for years. I have quite the collection of Sandman-branded merchandise, and I have a half-a-dozen special collectors’ edition books, not Sandman-related, written by Neil. I have the Warning: Contains Language CD. I have a 1000-run edition of Murder Mysteries, hand-bound, published by Biting Dog Press. Sure, I have the Hugo-winning Sandman comic, “Midsummer’s Night Dream,” the only comic ever, and forever, to win. At least 50 things I could have signed by Neil? Yes, a conservative estimate.

So here, I’ve gone into the city without anything, and will have to buy a book. But this was no big deal, really, because I wanted to get a copy of Sandman Endless Nights, the first Sandman-related thing Neil has written in years. I (correctly) assumed that I’d be able to get a copy there, even though I wasn’t sure it had officially come out, yet.

At the DC booth, they had four copies on display, two hardcover, two soft. Of course, I was going to get the hardcover, but, no, DC wasn’t actually selling them. I’d have to go to the Borders down the road, I was told. I set off, leaving Katherine and Chris to wait on line. I walk down to the end of the fair, 55th Street, without seeing a Borders book store. Sweaty and concerned, I saw an information booth and asked the nice woman there where the nearest B. Dalton was.

I don’t know why I do this. B. Dalton hasn’t existed in New York in ten years, I think, and yet ask me to name a book store, and I’ll say B. Dalton without pause.

At any rate, the nice woman at the kiosk was old enough to know that B. Dalton was a book store and directed me to the Borders on 49th Street, where I had just come from. I blinked, thanked her, and then headed back down the road. When I got to 49th Street, doubting-Thomas that I am, I scoffed at the idea that I’d miss the book store. There was no Borders building here, I said to myself. See? It’s not here at all... oh, look, it’s a booth right next to the DC Comics booth. Oh. Right.

I got on line to buy the book, and called over about five feet away from me where Katherine and Chris were still waiting. “Hey, look,” I said, “the book is being sold right here.” I gave a sheepish smile.

Then with book firmly in hand, and paper bracelet, used to guarantee those waiting on line a signature from Neil, firmly on wrist, I waited for another twenty minutes or so for Neil, who arrived and started signing early. What a guy. We were given yellow Post-Its™ to write our name on, so Neil wouldn’t have to guess spellings and such, so when I got up to him, he asked, “Jonathan, is it?”

“Mmm hmm,” I said.

And I wanted to say a thousand things to him! Do you want to go get sushi after this, Neil? Murder Mysteries is my favorite short story, but did you know I never got that one detail about the newspaper story until I read the illustrated version? “Ramadan” was my favorite Sandman story, and I think it perfectly highlighted your amazing ability to join real myths with those you’ve made up yourself and pull them together in one hell of an entertaining story. That’s called pastiche, right? I’m envious that you can write so well, so often, and still have the will and energy to update your online journal. You really connect with your audience. Oh, and Daniel, and Delirium, and Mervyn Pumpkinhead, and Door, and Low-Key, and Wednesday, and Shadow, and Snow, Glass, and Apples....

But what I said, after he drew a really cool, really funky Sandman in silver ink on the inside of Sandman Endless Nights, was, “Thank you, very, very much.”

“Oh, you’re quite welcome,” he said, and I moved aside.

Twenty seconds. Twenty seconds with a man of genius, a man who has entertained and educated me, and countless others, for over ten years. And then I moved aside.

Chris gave him a copy of Good Omens to sign, and he wrote, “Burn this book!” We’re not sure why.

We trekked down to Little Italy afterwards, for the last day of the Feast of San Gennero, and I had a stuffed artichoke, Katherine had a cannoli, and Chris had chicken shish-kabob. Yeah, Chris is a real lover of the Italian food. The crowd was thick, and the sun on our backs got us too hot and too tired too quickly, so we left the City shortly afterwards. But I got my book and my twenty seconds.

Hope to see you next year, Neil.

Posted by Jonathan at 02:20 AM, 25 September 2003 | Comments (2)

That’ll sock it to them libruls

Recently seen bumper sticker:

The #1 Endangered Species?
The Pre-Born CHILD!
It’s a CHILD ...Not a CHOICE!

Posted by Jonathan at 01:45 AM, 21 September 2003 | Comments (4)

The week so far...

Days of the week: 3
Accidents: 4
Loser: Jonathan

Quick highlights:

Monday a.m.: Blow circuit on heat lamp by touching electric element to metal. Scare cooks at Applebees with nice 220 volt spark.
Result: Embarrassment

Monday p.m.: Fail to turn gas valve completely off before working on safety valve on stove. Scare cooks at different Applebees by setting own hair on fire.
Result: Mostly an awful smell... and embarrassment

Tuesday p.m.: Run current through poorly re-wired compressor until run capacitor blows from pressure, shooting gooey, battery acid-like substance on self and compressor.
Result: If no one was around to see it, is it still embarrassing? Yes.

Wednesday p.m.: Stop for ambulance going through intersection, get slammed in rear by kid in a Cougar. Bumper on van works well; Cougar’s hood sheared halfway to windshield.
Result: Concern for kid in Cougar, but both walk away without injury. Well, one gets towed away. Oh, and embarrassment.

Posted by Jonathan at 08:08 PM, 10 September 2003 | Comments (0)

Not unless you know something that I don’t

“Hello?” I say into my cell phone.

A young woman answers, “Dad?”

“Uh, you have the wrong number,” I say.

“Oh,” she suppresses a laugh, “sorry about that.”

“No problem.”

Posted by Jonathan at 06:41 PM, 09 September 2003 | Comments (3)