{"id":53,"date":"2002-12-01T20:42:16","date_gmt":"2002-12-02T01:42:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/localhost\/macphoenix.com\/?p=53"},"modified":"2022-12-10T22:17:20","modified_gmt":"2022-12-11T03:17:20","slug":"wwjd","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/2002\/12\/wwjd\/","title":{"rendered":"WWJD?"},"content":{"rendered":"

We interrupt this blog for a very special interview with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.<\/em><\/p>\n

Jesus<\/b>: Thank you very much, Mac, for letting me take this opportunity to address the world at large to answer a question that has been raised recently, namely, “What would Jesus drink?” I think the answer to this is obvious\u2026<\/p>\n

MacPhoenix<\/b>: Excuse me, Jesus, but\u2026<\/p>\n

Jesus<\/b>: Hey, Mac, didn’t you ever learn that it isn’t nice to interrupt? Especially when I decide whether or not you get into heaven?<\/p>\n

MacPhoenix<\/b>: Yes, Lord, but\u2026<\/p>\n

Jesus<\/b>: Thank you. Anyway, anyone who knows Me knows that I love a drop of Manischewitz now and again. So when someone asks, “What would Jesus drink?” you can assure him that I drink Manischewitz. But lately\u2026<\/p>\n

MacPhoenix<\/b>: Um, Jesus, You see\u2026<\/p>\n

Jesus<\/b>: Look, Mac, you gave Me this opportunity to answer this philosophical question that has been all over the media, and I’m answering it. To continue, sometimes on a Sunday night after all the prayers have been answered, St. Peter and I like to kick back and watch some football with a few brewskis. Lately, I’ve been into Magic Hat’s Fat Angel<\/a>. It’s got a really nice, mellow flavor, and it reminds me of Raphael, who’s been putting on a few pounds in the past millennium.<\/p>\n

MacPhoenix<\/b>: Jesus, I’m sorry. We want to know what would Jesus drive, not what You would drink.<\/p>\n

Jesus<\/b>: Beg pardon?<\/p>\n

MacPhoenix<\/b>: Yeah, the question is, “What would Jesus drive?<\/a>”<\/p>\n

Jesus<\/b>: But I don’t drive.<\/p>\n

MacPhoenix<\/b>: But if You did?<\/p>\n

Jesus<\/b>: Look, I’ve been doing just fine for two thousand years with just My sandals. The last thing I need to worry about is insurance. I mean, you turn into a senior citizen and those rates shoot right up to heaven. I’m a senior 30 times over. And I wouldn’t even know where to buy one. We don’t have any car salesmen up here. And do I put one of those tacky fish on My car? Or maybe just a vanity plate spelling out “JESUS,” and a tag border that says “Be very careful: Your Savior is in this car.”<\/p>\n

MacPhoenix<\/b>: Thank You, Jesus, for taking the time to answer this thought-provoking question. Next week, we’ll be talking to the Pat Robertson on his views about gay, Liberal Muslims: Are they the chosen people? Good night.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We interrupt this blog for a very special interview with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_import_markdown_pro_load_document_selector":0,"_import_markdown_pro_submit_text_textarea":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-53","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-satirefarce"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/s8nj3d-wwjd","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/53","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=53"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/53\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":933,"href":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/53\/revisions\/933"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=53"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=53"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/macphoenix.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=53"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}