Living Things

Instance 3: Kitten

Princess’s nemesis at the office was Kitten, a semi-superior who dressed provocatively to hide her fear of rejection. Kitten’s hemline was inappropriate for a brothel, which made her popular with most of the salesmen in the company. Her neckline plunged to depths not seen by most divers, which made her popular with just about every man in the office, save but two. She also hung her jackets inside out so the tags would show, proving her petite size. Kitten had to be seen to be believed, and she preferred it that way.

Kitten wanted to have a meeting with Princess.

In the back corner of the office, the dread was palpable. Huffy and KevCan conferred over what the meeting signified for the future of Princess.

“It can’t be good news,” Huffy sighed.

“No, it can’t,” KevCan agreed.

The two tried to keep their spirits light by cracking jokes about what the two women would be discussing, and then they turned their sights on the foibles of the salesmen, which were many, therefore easy to pinpoint. As they chatted and worked, KevCan spent a fifth of his keystrokes writing this poem:

There are summer days
and some might say
that those days are wonderful

There are autumn winds
and dusk begins
the sun sets more magical

There are winter snows
and icy flows
turning landscapes palatial

There are blooming springs
and nature sings
to make the year bountiful

There are these seasons four
still I am sure
that Princess is more beautiful
than all the days that will bring
summer, fall, winter, and spring

The subject of the email was “You are the most beautiful woman in the world :).”